home authors guest shorts graphical shorts

AcmeShorts

Another late night at the law offices of Sandinski, Hathowell and Kent. Veronica Della Pesuto, Esq., 27, lean and serious, Ivy League, stood at her desk, bent over the heaps of redwelds, post-it flags and redacted defendant's exhibits, scanning the chron file. In the morning she'd take her first depostion. Martin Wheeling. Engineer, 66 years old, Ivy League, formerly in charge of solid waste reclamation and asbestos abatement consultation for a firm in the business of aiding chemical companies litigating under Superfund. The partner, Coleman, was a brittle son of a bitch and he'd be there every second scrutinizing her every word, jotting notes for the big Saliva Spray during the ride back in the Town Car. He'd be on the phone calling for velobound transcripts before they even got back. It'd be a heck of a day. And she was having trouble focusing. What a pain in the ass.

"Fuck it!" Veronica screamed, sweeping half the papers from her desk. "Fuck it hard!" She reached back madly, clawing for the ass of Keith Debron, extension 4122, the 22-year-old paralegal from California who was sliding his cock deeply into her from behind. She quit clawing, planted her palms on the oaken slab and shimmied backward as she ecstatically came against him. "Ohhhh Jesus motherfucking christ! Shangri La!!"

Keith released his load a second later and slumped against her back, which he admired for a moment. Damn. Maybe she'd been a swimmer in college? He lost the thought, cupped her breast absently and spun her toward him. She hiked her ass up onto the desk and smiled, and pushed him away.

Keith grinned like a kid and panted. He made quote marks with his fingers and giggled as he said, "Was that the information you requested?"

"Yes, thank you Keith." She paused, gathering her breath. "I do regret," then she made quote marks too, "keeping you up so long."

"It's my pleasure to help. I know...it must be hard for you."

"Well, thank you for coming."

They looked at each other a moment. "Keith, do you think that is all the information you have for me this evening?"

And on it went. It was this joke they had.

Date Written: August 12, 2004
Author: Great Satan
Average Vote: 4.6

Comments:
08/16/2004 TheBuyer (5): Damn right.
08/16/2004 qualcomm (4):
08/16/2004 Will Disney (5): this is a five star short!
08/16/2004 Dick Vomit (5): Affirm/agree.
08/16/2004 Benny Maniacs (4): Puns hit me a little flat, but otherwise a refreshing, well-researched, well-crafted Julia Roberts vehicle.
08/16/2004 Dylan Danko (5): "clawing for the ass of Keith Debron, extension 4122"
08/16/2004 Mr. Pony (5): Shangri La!
08/16/2004 John Slocum (4): Excellent. I popped a boner.
08/16/2004 Ferucio P. Chhretan (4):
08/17/2004 Mr. Pony: Hi, Great Satan! I bow before you.
08/17/2004 Great Satan: Thanks, everybody. 666.
08/19/2004 scoop (5): I'm heading down the highway Sign has three inverted nines If the lord don't get me the devil will But not without a fight PS: Your Welcome.
01/7/2005 Mr. Pony: Hello again, Great Satan!
01/7/2005 Dylan Danko: Why am i following you around, Pony? WHat are you doing tonight?
01/7/2005 Mr. Pony: I hadn't planned anything--you?
01/7/2005 Dylan Danko: QC has a 36 inch TV.
01/7/2005 Mr. Pony: Hey, where'd the short go? What was that all about?
01/7/2005 Mr. Pony: Oh--oh, never mind! La la la!
01/7/2005 Jon Matza: That's enough, Pony.
01/13/2005 scoop: Hey, DV voted on his own short. A Stryperish move for the Great Satan. 777. PS -- Satan is a title no a proper name. MEH. LARLARLAR. SCreeeeeeeeeeeee.
01/19/2005 Dick Vomit: I don't think it's the only time, either!