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There's a story once told to me as a young man that I really took to heart. It is only now that I start to call its validity into question.
My uncle Bud, known throughout town as a womanizing jackass, really took a liking to me. I guess he knew that since my dad wasn't around, I might need a little "guidance," so to speak, when it came to the ladies.
Basically, Uncle Bud told me the tale of a particularly lusty encounter he had enjoyed with a lady friend named Norma and his best buddy Reynaldo.
Now, Uncle Bud insisted the encounter was strictly hetero. Why? Because even though he and Reynaldo had enjoyed the same woman at roughly the same time, they never touched, except for a perpetual high-five they gave each other throughout. Over time, Uncle Bud's stature only grew in my eyes, and his supposed actions, which became ingrained, served as a mantra.
To this day, I have never enjoyed the company of more than one person at a time in bed. And yet I have felt quite near to the fantasy, because I choose to high-five an invisible friend whenever making love to my wife, who is now estranged and filing for divorce.
Date Written: February 04, 2005Comments:
Average Vote: 4
02/22/2005 Will Disney: i can understand why she would do that.
02/22/2005 TheBuyer (4): Funny story that gets bogged down by the telling, but I like it anyway. Yay me. Hi five.
02/22/2005 Litcube (4): Funny.
02/22/2005 Partytime: I'm worried about the implications here. If I bang a cunt in her cunt and another dude is donating some throat tickle, then we Chinese firedrill the shit, is that gaydom? And, like how long does it have to be that someone else's dick has been out before it's ok to shaft in? I suspect that the answer may be never, which is unsettling indeed.
02/22/2005 TheBuyer: Depends. If you see cock during the switch, or if you miscommunicate and accidentally switch the same way and bump him on the way around, you just fucked a guy. Solution? That's what her ass is for.
02/22/2005 The Rid (4): I'm not surprised the wife is estranged! Why didn't he just bring his best bud to bed? Would that make him a big homo?
02/22/2005 Jawbreaker (4): I'm not surprised the wife is estranged! Why didn't he just bring his best bud to bed? Would that make him a big homo?
02/22/2005 Jawbreaker: Seriously though, I fancied it!
02/22/2005 The Rid: Jawbreaker: You're an assmouth. Ha!
02/22/2005 Jawbreaker: Thanks, Rid! I learn from the best!
02/22/2005 The Rid: Thanks, Jawbreaker! I learn from the best!
02/22/2005 Jawbreaker: Sorry Author, just have to get this one out. Rid: Blow me!
02/22/2005 Mr. Pony: I miss Mr. Negative! He was the only one who could keep you fucking idiots in line!
02/22/2005 Mr. Pony: I'm kidding! I don't miss Mr. Negative!
02/22/2005 Mr. Pony (4): I love the structure of the last sentence.
02/22/2005 Mr. Negative: FU!
02/23/2005 Klause Muppet (4):