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The miniature robots moved up Sally’s vagina into her uterus, heading toward the fallopian tubes. Sally lay on the examining table. Her doctor, also a woman (!), was standing by her side.
“Is it working, doctor?” Sally asked. “Are the units going to be able to find the problem?”
“Yes, they’re working fine,” said the Doctor. “I think I’ll have some happy news for you shortly.”
The robots moved up in Sally’s left ovary, and proceeded to start grabbing eggs with their pincers and placing them into the mini-incineration/power units on their backs. They consumed all the eggs. Then they headed down and back into the right ovary, and repeated. All of Sally’s eggs were gone. Now the units split up. One of them started to head down toward the vagina. The other one broke through the uterine wall and moved upwards towards the stomach.
“I’ve got some good news and some bad news,” said the Doctor. “The bad news is that you’ll never have babies now.”
“Oh no!” yelled Sally. “Oh God!”
“The good news is that in about 45 seconds, you’ll have one miniature robot constantly stimulating your G-spot, and another one controlling your motor functions via your brain stem. And you’ll be happy now forever and ever without a care in the world. Just like me, Sally. JUST LIKE ME!”
And it was true. Sally was happy forever and ever after that. Just like the doctor!
Date Written: April 02, 2005Comments:
Author: Will Disney
Average Vote: 4.4
04/11/2005 Will Disney: This one is a little graphic, no?
04/11/2005 Will Disney: I mean - VAGINA?
04/11/2005 Klause Muppet (4): Classic
04/11/2005 Jon Matza (5): Enjoyed this greatly. Cherry first line, lots of ace jokes. Esp liked that parenthetical exclamation point joke (how incredible the doctor could be a woman!) & the "mini-incineration/power units" on the robots' backs. 4.77.
04/11/2005 John Slocum (4): A well spun tale. Nice work, Disney! And nice try trying to throw people off your trail by pinning this on me. 'Oh, there's some physiology references, oooohh, this must be Slocum, ooooohhh!' It's not going to work, Disney. When a short references the way the Loop of Henley concentrates urine, or the way an action potential travels along a neuron, then you can dish it off on Dr. Slocum. Until then, a couple of physiological vocabulary words isn't going to do it. ('oooohhhh, fallopian tubes, uuuuuuuurrrrgh, brain stem.' fucking jerk.)
04/11/2005 Dick Vomit (4):
04/11/2005 Mr. Pony (5): ha ha
04/11/2005 Front (5):
04/11/2005 Ewan Snow (4): So author, why do these robots kill the eggs, rather than just go about their main task, namely taking over the "motor functions via your brain stem" and rubbing the G-Spot. Also, are we meant to believe that Sally will now become a doctor and infect other chicks with tiny robots "JUST LIKE ME"? Was this doctor herself infected by her doctor? And who was her doctor infected by? By who? Who?
04/11/2005 Will Disney: You don't say!
04/11/2005 Pfineous: Disney, Slocum makes some good points below.
04/11/2005 Ewan Snow: Ha! My plan, foiled! I gotta say, Whom is one of the funniest ideas for a fake user ever.
04/12/2005 Benny Maniacs (5): Like a distorted power-chord played with reverb, this has a nice ring to it.
04/14/2005 Streifenbeuteldachs: Classic Disney final exclamation mark!
04/14/2005 Will Disney: Matza says it's overused. I hear that...
04/14/2005 Jon Matza: Did I say that? I didn't say that!
04/14/2005 Jon Matza: I implied it.
04/14/2005 Will Disney: Oh right, it was the last sentence repeating that you had a beef with.
04/14/2005 qualcomm (4):
04/15/2005 The Rid (4): Ah, Disney.
04/18/2005 John Slocum: “Oh God!”