home authors guest shorts graphical shorts


Is my believability as a gnome crucial to this play's success? Or is the fact that my portrayal may matter so little to the audience at large that I put a disproportionate amount of focus on my own prominence (or lack thereof) at the expense of the cast and the play itself?

Is my hair thinning?

Is my love for the miniature guillotine I've created from popsicle sticks and paste, extremely accurate to scale, an indication of an unhealthy fixation on self-mutiliation, as I find my member magnetically drawn to its easy circumference, inevitably to be filled with penis-mashing blade? Or do I simply love the French culture in a sentimental way, as I attempt to create a revisionist history in which my tallywhacker is majestically saved, just in the nick of time, by the deus ex machina which is my thumb and forefinger?

Are those kumquats still fresh?

Date Written: May 03, 2005
Author: Turgid
Average Vote: 3.7778

05/10/2005 Klause Muppet (5): A masterpiece!
05/10/2005 Turgid (5): Now this is more like it.
05/10/2005 The Rid (3): Mundane - mundane - psychotic - mundane (structure) is not shocking, funny, or, dare I say, "neat." Eh.
05/10/2005 Klause Muppet: Oh no! Quick Guests, submit more shorts! We need to reach 10+ again!
05/10/2005 Dave Heiny (3): Liked it till you went with the old "kumquat" standby. "Cum" "twat"...hehehe. Try the "pull my finger" one next as the big bang ending.
05/10/2005 anonymous: Standby?
05/10/2005 cuntry (3): paste is one of my 3 favorite words.
05/10/2005 TheBuyer: Same goes for 'butternut squash'.
05/10/2005 TheBuyer (4): Sorry, that butternut was for Dave.
Cuntry, yes, paste!
05/10/2005 TheBuyer: Also, what are the other two words?
05/10/2005 Mr. Pony (4): Third para' is a lot of fun!
05/10/2005 Will Disney (4): a breath of fresh air
05/10/2005 Dick Vomit (4): xxxxxxxxxxxxxmmmmmmmmmmhggghggvgcgx
05/10/2005 John Slocum (4): good tone, a fine job.
05/10/2005 cuntry: cake is another
05/14/2005 TheBuyer: I like "tundra".
05/14/2005 Mr. Pony: Polymorphonuclearleukocytes.