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That McGinty sure gets a rise outta me!
"Hey, McGinty. You fling me the hairy eyeball one more time and so help me I'll cripple ya. I'll smash you up. I'll sell your balls to the dingbat who lives in my mudda's basement. I'll smack ya fuckin' head for ya."
It was a fuckin' no braina McGinty'd do sumpin', so I just waited. "Well, ya fuck, ya?" I fingered the fuckin' baloney sengwidge in my lunch pail.
Meanwhiles, McGinty was sittin' side-down on the seat of his brammel, cockin' a pigeon's neck my way and dragged a greasy finga across the stubbly length of his jawbone. The banjo playa-looking motherfucka. I gave the fuck a prompt by jutting my chest and sort a letting everyting just pump in his direction, kinda as if to say, like, "WHAT?"
That snickering shit. He just sat there grinnin' like a fiend, fuckin' nudgin' his lackey fucks a his O'Malley and Shaunessey. Those two fuckin' tahds had the intelligent quotient of an Italian.
And like FAHHHHHK YOOOUUUU he goes, all slow.
"That does it!" And like a fuckin' puma I go for the socket wrench! And then the fuckin' door to the lunch locker opens and it's the god damned foreman.
"Da fuck?" he goes. And so we all just shut up. And he looks at me real hard, the foreman does, and repeats his self. "Da fuck, Moynihan?" And over his shoulder if fuckin' tard McGinty isn't grinnin' the grin and mouthing it all silent-like: FAHHHHHK YOOOUUUU...
God! That McGinty sure gets a rise outta me!
Date Written: August 18, 2005
Author: Dick Vomit
Average Vote: 4.5
Comments:
08/18/2005 qualcomm (4): fuckin mcginty
08/18/2005 Dick Vomit (4.5): the fuck
08/18/2005 Mr. Pony (4.5): like a fuckin' puma
08/18/2005 TheBuyer (4.5): the fuck, that snickering shit.
08/18/2005 Kenji X: I have been instructed by qualcomm to forward this message: uh, im qualcomm, im like too cool for capital letters and proper punctuation and stuff, so, uh, i wanted to say that because you used the word tahrd you are a cheap whore licking scumbag relying on easy laughs for the simpleton set, and now ill use some really long words from my really old and really long word dictionary to amuse myself, apatosaurus, streptomycete, ganglion, pontification, horseradish, cow, now bow down before me and lick my sac
08/19/2005 Dick Vomit: Hey, alright! Kenji-X!
08/19/2005 The Rid: Well done, Kenji.
08/19/2005 qualcomm: yeah, it's different in this one, kenji. also, while we're on the subject of acme personality foibles, why not come out from behind your anonymity and admit who you really are? the advantage you gain from it is cowardly and, i might add, as easy as a rid punchline.
08/19/2005 Dick Vomit: This is a pretty decent instashort.
08/19/2005 qualcomm: ha!
08/19/2005 Dick Vomit: Yup. Pretty decent.
08/19/2005 Dick Vomit: Maybe I was wrong about instant shorts.
08/19/2005 Kenji X: None shall ever know my true identity and this is what will be the deaths of you all. Tards.
08/19/2005 Mr. Pony: Well, you're clearly not who I thought you were.
08/19/2005 Dick Vomit: Nobody cares, you dangly labia, you.
08/22/2005 Dick Vomit: FUUUUUCK
08/22/2005 Mr. Pony: I can't believe that Kenji X was Joe Fraankenstone all along.
08/22/2005 Dick Vomit: This piece of shit is like my best-rated short ever.
08/25/2005 The Rid (5):