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I'm so sick of twins. It's so played out. Am I the only one? Of course I'm not. "Hey, why do you guys wear the same clothes?" "Oh, are you guys completely identical? (Snicker)." Also, the concept of banging two identical sisters is very blase. It's very Caligula, really. (The Guccione version.) I once knew these guys who won a scholarship because they were twins. I once knew these twins -- and for some reason one of the guys was three inches taller (!) -- that did used car commercials in my hometown. I actually thought that was a little sad -- that one of the twins wasn't given enough to eat growing up and/or didn't put a high priority on personal fitness/greatness (as I have). How about a twin bill? Well, Sir, do I get to pay just once? Even though the second movie isn't very good? "No, sir, I'm afraid not." I'm afraid you are a douche. Twin carbine engines. The Minnesota Twins. Oh -- the Twin Cities then -- that's pretty stupid. Why don't you put some twin dollars together and double your money and buy back that horrendous hockey team that migrated to Dallas, you queens. The concept of doubles is actually much cooler, and less fey. You get rhymes with "Double Trouble," you get Acclaim's Double Dragon (and that movie with the midget from Party of Five never happened, by the way)...you even get Double D's! You see what I'm talking 'bout? Also, "Double my pleasure." Doublemint gum. "On the double." "Give me a double." It's endless, really.
Date Written: September 30, 2005
Average Vote: 2.5