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Coolio entered my local coffee joint and I was like, no way. I looked around, to see if others would give respect to the Cool guy. The Israeli "partners" were still seducing subletters with their sleazy sounding English - "Heeeeey man, how you doooing?" The customer service guy was all, "This is Tom", every time his cell phone rang. The crazy lady shuffled back and forth from the bar to the door with, "She stole my boyfriend." That's how blase all these mothers were being. Never mind that a fuckin' megastar just entered the building! Can't be bothered with a little oohing and ahhing. I wanted to punch their faces mostly. Each and every one of them. And that caused me to remain in a state of high alert. Attuned to their every retarded hiccup. It also caused me to miss Coolio, who must've exited as I was staring at the Israeli guys' matching sneakers. They didn't actually match, but they were the inverse of one another - navy with yellow laces for one, yellow with navy laces for the other, with legs growing out of them that shook and jammered around in constant nervous motion... .
Date Written: November 16, 2005
Average Vote: 2.25