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What the holy freaking god damned shit? I mean come on! Seriously. Come on! You know what? Forget it, just forget it. Let me talk to your manager. Listen buster I donít want to hear it! What happened to the customer is always right? What kind of, whatís the, I meanÖ Hello? Hello? No you listen. First off, I ordered this rape kit two weeks ago. Two weeks! What are you guys using over there to deliver product to customer, crippled pigeons? Jesus H.! So I wait and I wait and I wait. Finally, through some miracle unprecedented in the uni-fucking-verse it arrives. I figure, you know what, let bygones be bygones. Better late than never. Right? And a rape kit goes a long way to cheering this guy up. Listen Chauncey, Iím getting to the point, you hear? So I open it up, Iím all excited see, and what do I find? Cotton swabs? Urine collection containers? Envelopes? Labels? What are you people, a bunch of religious fanatics? Where are the gloves? The tape? The mask? The blunt object? The cleaning supplies? You guys are really running some kind of major league scam here. What happened to an honest product for an honest price? Huh? First off, I want my money back. Second off, Iím done with you. Listen shorty, I donít want to hear it. You guys have lost yourselves a customer.

Date Written: October 03, 2006
Author: scoop
Average Vote: 3.3

Comments:
10/4/2006 Sudoku (1.5):
10/5/2006 Litcube: Wait a minute, Scoop. He ordered a rape kit. And he thought that he was getting a kit so that he could rape people. But really, the kit was for victims of rape. So this guy's mad! I would be mad too if I got something other than expected. Hey, Scoop? My grandfather ordered a fly trap when he was younger. It was guaranteed to kill flies dead. He received two blocks of wood in the mail. Scoop, that's a true story.
10/5/2006 Master Bates (4.5):
10/7/2006 mixelpix (5): brilliant green feminist deconstruction narrative. therapist, the_rapist? chicken, egg? wave, particle? perhaps he was looking for a pressing kit to harvest rape oil? check out the etymology of canola and rape and the Manitoba growers association of Canuckia.
10/8/2006 thecrutchofsociety (1): bad, I hate this one
10/9/2010 Marvin_Bernstein (4.5):