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Terri the Turtle rolled onto his back and stared at the sun, letting his boy-cunt flap in the breeze and dreaming about the rubber raft he would soon buy. His half-brother Timothy called him on the cell phone and said, "Why don't we plant trees with the Adventure Clan this summer? Did you know that Dollar General is having a sale on all gardening supplies this week?" Terri admitted that he did not, so they decided to meet en route at Wal-Mart. Terri was admiring the wide selection of food products that Wal-Mart had to offer when Timothy arrived with Consuelo on his arm. The presence of the mute Venezuelan disconcerted Terri, who thought he was going to spend quality time this afternoon with his half-brother. He had just curtly excused himself to go visit the rubber rafts department when suddenly Timothy proposed marriage to Consuelo in the middle of the store. Terri the Turtle held his breath. When Mr Muffins found out, he would likely murder them all. Things Terri bought that were cheaper at Wal-Mart than at Piggly Wiggly: - cornmeal (for corn muffins) - 6-pack pepsi - pond's cold cream - olive loaf - a birthday cake for Timothy (Feb. 18)

Date Written: January 27, 2007
Author: blow-up
Average Vote:

01/31/2007 anonymous: I like the mute Venezuelan but the uploading of shopping lists is very frowned upon
02/1/2007 TheBuyer: this is very confusing, sir/bitch.
02/1/2007 scoop: I wonder if the author would care to share with the rest of us how he feels about his short. How did you ever think up the idea of the speaking turtle, for instance? Or the late introduciton of the mysterious Mr. Muffins? And the coda -- a list! -- is it a post-modern commentary on the toll runaway consumerism has on the soul of man qua man qua poet? Hm?
02/1/2007 blow-up: Nah, none of that. If you haven't read the other stories, then this one makes little sense.