home authors guest shorts graphical shorts


Lying on his back in the tall grass, Hunting Owl gazed at the clouds and ruminated. The quandary was like no other he had experienced or even heard song of in his 14 hunts. This much was true: Viable Corn was an attentive wife and a sturdy bearer of offspring. During the winter sojourn, she carried more weight than any other female of sled-dragging age. And did she not allow him to mount her in the time and manner of his choosing whenever the fever of mating overtook him?

Why then should his loins burn so for Destiny's Child, a young female barely out of her first season of lamentation? So strong had the desire grown, Hunting Owl could now mount Viable Corn only in the fashion of wolves, that her face would not scare away the spirit vision of Destiny's Child, which would visit him at these times. Now a new, more confusing vision played as vividly before Hunting Owl's eyes as the very clouds: Destiny's Child taking suck of Viable Corn's dugs, and then making feast of her birthing soil. What did this vision mean, Hunting Owl wondered, and why did it stir in him the fever of mating?

Date Written: June 04, 2004
Author: qualcomm
Average Vote: 4.64286

06/8/2004 Ewan Snow (4): Good idea.
06/8/2004 Jon Matza (5): "making feast of her birthing soil"--that's an understatement.
06/8/2004 TheBuyer (5): I have also had the fever of mating stirred in me by such a vision.
06/8/2004 John Slocum (5): Well done! "Destiny's Child taking suck of Viable Corn's dugs"
06/8/2004 Ferucio P. Chhretan (4): Hunting Owl's not ready for that jelly.
06/8/2004 Mr. Pony (4):
06/9/2004 Ferucio P. Chhretan: Pony, that is a jar of vaseline, right?
06/9/2004 Will Disney (5): i hate to give the lerpa a 5 but...
06/9/2004 Phony Millions (5): '...the spirit vision of Destiny's Child...' funny shit, the whole thing!
06/9/2004 Jon Matza: Plus also, 'Viable Corn' has to be one of the best Acme names in recent memory.
06/9/2004 Jimson S. Sorghum (5): What Matza said.
06/9/2004 scoop (4):
06/9/2004 Dylan Danko (5): Yeah, 'Viable Corn' is quite smashing.
06/13/2004 Benny Maniacs (4): This is a good short. It is a very genuine short. I didn't get it the first time but the fucker is sneaky. It's a sneaky, very badly behaved short. Bad short! Bad! In the words of Litcube, I'm giving it an four stars.
12/13/2004 Dick Vomit (5): I am so totally fine with coming here months after the fact and five-starring the living shit out of Viable Corn and the whole lot of 'em.
06/1/2005 The Rid (5): This has taken the top slot for me.