home authors guest shorts graphical shorts


Cranium McGee dipped his quill in ox blood, despite the warnings of corrosion offered by his art instructor.

“That’s no way to treat expensive quills! Why must everything you draw be in ox blood?” asked Professor Ganglion.

“Have you ever heard of cross hatching?” demanded Cranium with a saucy toss of his amber hair.

“Duh! I totally taught a semester on that.” Professor Ganglion rolled his eyes and, feeling that was not a harsh enough gesture of contempt, also stabbed Cranium’s crusty tonsure with a pallet knife. The blade dug in deeper than he expected and when he pulled it out, he found its crimson edge inspiring. As Cranium lost consciousness, the professor shoved him to the floor and took his place at the easel. “Yes, yes, he thought. One must use a pallet knife when painting in blood.”

And so, in death, Cranium McGee became a mediocre work of art, as in life he had been a mediocre artist.

Date Written: February 21, 2003
Author: Ewan Snow
Average Vote: 4

05/17/2004 John Slocum (5): Is this yours, Snow? Or is it Jimson's, or is it Frondscand's? Whoever wrote it, very nicely done.
05/17/2004 Ewan Snow: This one's mine. Those last two were the only ones under my name that I don't think I wrote. So there!
05/17/2004 qualcomm: why did the professor need to shove CW McGee to the floor as he lost consciousness? he sounds real impatient. last graf = error.
05/17/2004 John Slocum: He was sitting in front of the easel where the prof. wanted to be. Another moment and he would have fallen, but he was so inspired by the crimson edge, he couldn't wait that long.
03/1/2005 qualcomm: why is cranium mcgee's tonsure crusty?
03/1/2005 Klause Muppet (4):
03/1/2005 The Rid: Points alone for the name "Cranium McGee."
03/1/2005 John Slocum: Why did Professor Ganglion teach a semester of cross hatching?
03/1/2005 qualcomm: did it ever occur to you that professor ganglion may be lying? ask yourself: who would benefit?
03/1/2005 anonymous: Yeah, The Rid, points alone, you lousy fucking sycophant.
03/1/2005 anonymous: My Favorite Web Site
03/3/2005 The Rid: Whew! I wonder what the comments would have been if I actually voted!
03/3/2005 Mr. Pony (3):
03/4/2005 TheBuyer (4):