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I'm thinking of a story about an Indian guy from India. I'm not sure how it's going to end, but holy shit it's going to be funny. This guy, Shalamar, was meditating on a hilltop outside of New Delhi. He talked all goofy in that percolating Indian talk that sounds so lacking in machismo. But he wasn't talking right now, he was meditating.

All of a sudden, four Californian Lesbians walked up the hill. They were trying to make him break his concentration. He was looking straight through them, and refused to acknowledge their presence. Since the hot lesbians were wearing bikini tops, they had no problem in letting their white, hairless orbs drop out. They swung the spheres back and forth, taunting him. Shalamar had never seen such white breasts, and the glare of them made him look. He instantly fell over laughing.
"Aw shit", he said in Bollywoodese. "You guys got me."

The lesbians giggled and then whispered to one another in a huddle. Their leader spoke up:
"Shalamar, we're lesbians." She said. "But we'd like to make you our first male experience."
"Thanks, but no thanks", Shalamar said. "I have to resume meditation, ladies." They pouted and protested, but eventually came to respect his religion, and let him be.

That night, Shalamar meditated on what it would have been like to have boned all those white-breasted lesbians. Now I could go into how he pictured his chocolate bar cock tunneling between those vanilla scoops, while the strawberry nipples bounced and circled, but for all purposes, my job here is pretty much done.

Date Written: September 06, 2004
Author: Benny Maniacs
Average Vote: 3.8571

09/8/2004 Ferucio P. Chhretan: I've got Bollywood.
09/8/2004 Pfineous (4): I've got bigger Bollywood.
09/8/2004 Mr. Pony (5): I very much liked reading this.
09/8/2004 Will Disney (5): this one is begging for a sequel. 4.5 stars!
09/8/2004 Will Disney: got me too.
09/8/2004 qualcomm (3):
09/8/2004 qualcomm: (people who gave 5's don't know what they're talking about)
09/8/2004 Litcube (4): I lilly liked this. I am thinking that it was very humorous!
09/8/2004 TheBuyer: not so much this time.
09/8/2004 qualcomm: pork

09/8/2004 TheBuyer (3): ya, it's just not there.
09/8/2004 Litcube: Someone's in trouble.
09/8/2004 Jon Matza: I wouldn't have passed up four pairs of white hairless orbs in a million years!
09/8/2004 Ewan Snow: Oh, yeah? Then suck my balls!
09/8/2004 Jon Matza: Are you serious? You have a sac-of-eight?
09/8/2004 Ewan Snow: Count 'em and weep, muthafucka!
09/8/2004 qualcomm: hey pony, you are a fucking idiot for giving this five stars!
09/8/2004 scoop (3): Ewan's number of balls minus the stars for this short = 5
09/8/2004 qualcomm: this is the "Zapped" of shorts.
09/8/2004 qualcomm: i mean
09/8/2004 TheBuyer: Sometimes I think you hurt Benny Maniacs on purpose with your words.
09/8/2004 scoop: Yeah, so?
09/8/2004 TheBuyer: Just sayin.
09/8/2004 Mr. Pony: Hey Summer, why is it that whenever you open your mouth lately, you are doing it while marching back and forth across the room, wearing a Burger King crown on your head, with a bedspread tied around your neck, waving a toilet plunger around like a scepter? I mean, I think you would be more respectable if you didn't make all these implicit demands while you were doing that, is all.
09/9/2004 qualcomm: why are you such a dumb hawaiian jerk, constantly eating coconuts, bananas, pineapples and the like? greeting and bidding farewell to people by sticking out your thumb and pinky, shaking your hand a bit and saying, "Hang ten, bra."? losing relatives in lava flows?
09/9/2004 Mr. Pony: Take your thumb out of your mouth when you're talking; I can barely understand you.
09/9/2004 Litcube: Oh fuck that imagery was funny. Toilet plunger scepter! Holy shit!
09/9/2004 scoop: Lava flows are no joking matter.
09/9/2004 scoop: Except for this one, Hey, why did the lava flow cross the road?
09/9/2004 TheBuyer: I don't know, why?
09/9/2004 Benny Maniacs: To suck the life out of your heritage, rendering it a dust-pile.