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I am Lady Slatternly’s Lover
Yes, Bitch, that’s you
You are so beautiful when you cry
That is why I hit you
Mercilessly
I ought not whisper this
And I yearn to call it from the rooftops
The ones above your bare breasted
Mop ‘N’ Glo-ed floor
So strident
The sound of your bosomed self-worth
Against loose
Tiles
I am driving through Thai Town
I coast upon the fumes of chicken satay
That you love so well
You forsake me
Let’s take a curry bath
Now
You female vagabond.
Date Written: September 30, 2004
Author: Turgid
Average Vote: 2.6667
Comments:
10/8/2004 TheBuyer (4):
10/8/2004 Will Disney: I'm not sure I quite get this one. Someone: explain!
10/8/2004 qualcomm: hey everyone: airea's back!
10/8/2004 Dick Vomit: Not feelin' it.
10/8/2004 qualcomm: it's cool
10/8/2004 John Slocum: Can't wait for Mr. Pony's Robot-interpretation, that is if the robot's still alive.
10/8/2004 anonymous: That robot's got no soul, as compared to the author/narrator, who's pouring his heart out right here before your very eyes.
10/8/2004 qualcomm (2): i don't like "poetry"
10/8/2004 anonymous: Sure. But this is floetry.
10/8/2004 Yahzick (2): I didn't like this at all. But I gave it two stars because "You are so beautiful when you cry, that's why I hit you," is one of my favourite things to say to my brow-beaten bitches.
10/8/2004 [Censored]: i like to say, please don't cry, it's really not a turn-on
10/8/2004 anonymous: The bias towards anti-Southeast Asian sentiment on this site is troubling.
10/8/2004 TheBuyer: hi Author. could you please elaborate on that last point about the racism against the south east asians, I don't see it.
10/8/2004 anonymous: The narrator is cruising through Thai Town. Obviously some readers have a distaste for this geographical location; otherwise, they would have awarded the short with more prestige.
10/8/2004 TheBuyer: The geography didn't have as much to with it as the format. So far poetry, songs, gansta rap, lists, two line 'jokes', and scanned bits of shit found in the trash have all been rated fairly low. Welcome to the club of failed off-format shorts, you're in good company [I'd link all this stuff but the html gag-order prevents me from doing so]
10/8/2004 scoop: From here on out we shall all refer to second-class Asian peoples (non-Japanese) as Yobos. Furthermore we shall all enjoy doing so.
10/8/2004 scoop: This sucks as well. But that hit you line was good. But I can't tell if it was supposed to be funny or meaningful.
10/9/2004 TheBuyer: If it helps, my whole comes from the assumption the narrator is a jerkoff.