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There was a God. At least, there was a God-like figure. He didn't have anything to do, however, with the creation of the Earth. That was separate.

But God did exist, as a man floating up in space.

God had turned into a horrible pervert over time. For the first three billion years, he had been able to turn himself by fantasizing about pretty straightforward stuff. But somewhere in Four Billions he had become jaded, and those well-worn images in the old spank bank were not doing the trick anymore.

And so it had come to this. God had his dick being sucked down hard by a black hole. He was snuffing out populated planets with his right hand, and holding up the blanket with the left hand.

After a few false starts and after setting one really advanced planet fully ablaze, he managed to drip out a few billion tons of liquid hydrogen, which was what came out when his heart wasn't in it.

His heart never seemed to be in it anymore.

Date Written: November 08, 2004
Author: Will Disney
Average Vote: 3.7

11/18/2004 Will Disney: Wait - god has a blanket?
11/18/2004 The Rid: Lotsa shorts about head today!
11/18/2004 Mr. Pony (4): I think this one's probably true.
11/18/2004 qualcomm (3):
11/18/2004 The Rid (4):
11/18/2004 Dick Vomit: I am reminded of THIS SHORT HERE. A little.
11/18/2004 TheBuyer: what happens when his heart is in it I wonder.
11/18/2004 Litcube (3): God sounds like a pretty normal guy.
11/18/2004 Ewan Snow: "That was separate."
11/18/2004 Jimson S. Sorghum (4):
11/18/2004 John Slocum (3): bleh
11/18/2004 Jon Matza (4): Some taffeta throwaway lines in here.
11/18/2004 Benny Maniacs (4): Very funny idea, pretty good execution.
11/18/2004 anonymous: Thank you.
11/18/2004 anonymous: Thank you, Author.
11/18/2004 Dick Vomit (4): Pup tent.
11/18/2004 Jon Matza: I'M welcome.
11/18/2004 Jon Matza: HAHAHAHA!
11/18/2004 Jon Matza: sizzled, much?
11/18/2004 Jon Matza: You bunch of fucking pinwheels
11/18/2004 scoop: I know you are but what am I? Hmmmm?
11/18/2004 anonymous: Thanks.
11/18/2004 Jon Matza: I'M welcome!
11/18/2004 scoop: I know you are BUT WHAT AM I?
11/18/2004 scoop: what AM i? WHAT am i? what am I?
11/18/2004 Jon Matza: Define "am".
11/19/2004 Ewan Snow (4): I like this one more and more.
11/20/2004 John Slocum: I'm liking this more and more too and feel I owe good ol' disney a star.