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Kronos Regalia led his guests through the hedge maze and into greenhouse. The crowd filed around him as he snorted the odor of his prize-winning orchid.

“Supsilla Upsillatta, a rare hybrid created for the exclusive purpose of scoring with the ladies,” began Kronos, taking a deep breath in preparation for his declamation on the flower.

“How much d’ya need to water it?” asked a congenital douchebag in the front row.

“Half a teaspoon, three times a day,” answered Kronos, infuriated at the impertinence of the question.

The douchebag turned to the rest of the crowd and smirked. “Sounds like a pain in the ass, considering you gotta wlk through the hedge maze!”

Everyone laughed, and Kronoss, having a green thumb, bent the douchebag over and turned it brown.

Date Written: July 11, 2002
Author: Ewan Snow
Average Vote: 4.25

05/28/2004 TheBuyer (5): I think I rated this once before with a 5 for "congenital douchebag"...so, ten in total.
11/16/2004 qualcomm: look, i just wanted to know how much you need to water it. i see no reason for insults.
11/23/2004 John Slocum (4): Hey everyone, how about a few people vote on this so we can move on?
11/23/2004 Ewan Snow: Yeah, what the fuck? I'm sick of looking at this one. I mean, I like it okay, but enough is enough.
11/23/2004 Mr. Pony (4):
11/23/2004 TREE (4): Yeah! douchebag bent over.