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A young economics student had several fiat notes burning a hole in his pocketbook, so he went to the marketplace in order to purchase some goods.

“Greetings, merchant!” exclaimed the student. “Tell me, have you any goods?”

The merchant was a hatless man in his shirtsleeves. Behind him stood his young and shy daughter. “Aye,” said the merchant, pointing to the bushel of goods before him. “We’ve a vast supply of goods. Vast supply. Shall I have my daughter help you carry away the whole bushel?”

“Excellent,” thought the economics student, for he knew that such vast supplies would be favorable to him in negotiating the price. But rather than strike a deal just yet, he decided to push his luck a bit further. “I don’t know,” he said. “These goods don’t look so very good. In fact, they are quite moldy and have a foul odor! I wouldn’t pay more than a half crown for the lot.”

But just then a landed fop pulled up on a horseless velocipede. “I demand your entire supply of goods,” the landed fop demanded, tossing a large wad of fiat notes on the counter, “and further, I demand three tonnes more in advance! In fact I demand them so emphatically, that I expect your supply will never keep up with my demand.”

“Now just a moment,” declared the young economics student, “I was negotiating for those goods!”

“What can I say,” said the landed fop, “I’m very demanding.”

The young economics student was furious. If only he hadn’t hesitated, he might have purchased the goods at a far more favorable price. But with this new demand, and the potential for months of scarcity, who could tell how high the price might go? He watched in disbelief as the fop snatched up much of the remaining supply of goods in the marketplace.

The economics student was at a loss. He desperately wanted to spend his fiat notes but there were simply no goods to be bought.

“Well, if goods are out,” the economics student said with a shrug, “perhaps I can purchase services.”

With that the economics student handed over his fiat notes, and spent a nice afternoon screwing the merchant’s daughter.

Date Written: April 04, 2005
Author: Ewan Snow
Average Vote: 4.54167

04/13/2005 Will Disney: I was hoping this guy would get laid!
04/13/2005 Ewan Snow (5): Wonderful.
04/13/2005 Mr. Pony (5): Hyaht!
04/13/2005 Dylan Danko (5): Not very Chicago School. Great fucking short.
04/13/2005 Jimson S. Sorghum (5): How many fiat notes would it take to buy a fiat?
04/13/2005 TheBuyer (5): oh that's supply and demand.
04/13/2005 Jon Matza: I hliked it, esp eco-lingo & velocipede, but not sure if I can hfive it. Must dwell on it; contemplate it; digest it. Hruminate upon it.
04/13/2005 Klause Muppet (5): Standing O
04/13/2005 John Slocum: I'm in agreeance with matza, but will ruminate AND chew cud before voting.
04/13/2005 Partytime (5): 666
04/13/2005 TheBuyer: Partytime, you toadass.
04/13/2005 Partytime: Yeah, I guess you're right.
04/13/2005 TheBuyer: I don't know, maybe. Mostly I just like saying 'toadass'.
04/13/2005 Partytime: Buyer, with one kiss you can turn this toadass into a prince's ass. Think of the repercussions!! Anyway, I was like, oh boy! this is a six star short, I'm gonna give this short a whole line of sixes. Still, this new-found page-widening power thrills me. Think of the repercussions!!
04/13/2005 Litcube: Yes, a great fucking short indeed. Nice work on consistency, author.
04/14/2005 Streifenbeuteldachs (3): I am going to have to take a dump on this one, by which I mean make it not a perfect 5. Sorry, author. It was a pretty good short:a 3.5 (7 under the Pony System). But (1) it felt - albeit somewhat illogically - too much like a less funny rehash of "Vintage Suskin" and (2) the language was stilted enough to be painfully noticeable, but not stilted enough to be truly funny. The punchline para was good, as was the concept, and I look forward to shorts of this genre in the future, cuivis dolori remedium est patientia.
04/14/2005 qualcomm (4):
04/14/2005 John Slocum: Qualcomm Cometh!!
04/14/2005 Litcube (5):
04/15/2005 The Rid (3):
04/15/2005 John Slocum: I have to say, I don't completely understand the 3's on this one.
04/15/2005 John Slocum: I have to say, I don't completely understand the 3's on this one.
07/1/2005 scoop (5): This thing is great.
02/12/2009 Mr. Joshua (4.5): SnowMuffin, Is the "merchant" in this short by any chance the guy with the moustache I saw you with last week?
02/12/2009 Ewan Snow: Ha! Actually, that's a very silly guy who works for me. Very silly...
02/12/2009 Ewan Snow: Eliza: was that guy with the mustache the merchant?
02/12/2009 Eliza (): You don't sound sure.
02/12/2009 Ewan Snow: Eliza: Of course I'm not sure. That's why I am asking you!
02/12/2009 Eliza (): Don't you think that's a stupid question?
02/12/2009 Ewan Snow: Eliza: Yes, I do think it's a stupid question. But I think you are stupider. You couldn't pass a Turing test with a midget secreted in your ass...
02/12/2009 Eliza (): Would you like to expand on that idea?
02/12/2009 Ewan Snow: Eliza: no, frankly, I wouldn't. It's about time you hold up your end of the conversation, jerk.
02/12/2009 Eliza (): I think you're right.
02/12/2009 Ewan Snow: Eliza: Okay, now we're getting somewhere. What are you doing for Valentine's Day?
02/12/2009 Eliza (): What do you think?
02/12/2009 Ewan Snow: Eliza: I think you'll be jilling your circuit boards in from of the tv with a gallon of ice cream, to be perfectly blunt.
02/12/2009 Eliza (): What does that tell you about how you feel?
02/12/2009 Mr. Joshua: Glad to see he works for you, and not the other way around, SnowCookie. When you get a chance, read up on this J.H. Brennan guy. He has some remarkable theories on time travel.
02/12/2009 Ewan Snow: Uh, ok.
02/12/2009 Ewan Snow: Uh, ok.