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Joe Strong was a bad detective. Not bad as in evil. Bad as in incompetent.

“Where’s the diamonds?” he yelled, shaking the old lady violently.

“I dunno, I dunno,” she stammered.

“Tell me!” He pushed her against the wall. She hit her head and passed out. Joe had to let her slide to the ground. It was stupid because he knew the old lady couldn’t have known about the diamonds. She had a solid alibi. No, he was just being stupid. He was so fucking bad at this.

Joe walked back out to the street and went to get into his car. But he couldn’t get into the car because he had locked the keys inside. They were sitting right there on the seat. Holy fucking shit was he an idiot.

Joe had to walk back to his office. A bum was sitting out front by the stoop. The bum saw him and started making fun of him. “Ha, ha, it’s Joe the Private Dick. Dick, dick, dick. Look, it’s Joe the little dick.”

Jesus Christ he hated it when people made that joke.

Date Written: July 21, 2003
Author: Will Disney
Average Vote: 4.66667

07/21/2003 anonymous (5):
07/21/2003 anonymous (3):
07/21/2003 anonymous (5):
07/21/2003 anonymous (5):
07/21/2003 qualcomm (5): this is funny. this is very funny.
07/22/2003 Slappy White (4): And the hits just keep on coming. Great stuff. Beating Old Ladies = Comedy.
06/24/2004 TheBuyer (5): HA!
10/26/2004 Mr. Pony (5): Goddamn!
11/10/2004 TheBuyer: 5 more.
11/10/2004 TREE (5): fuck is he stupid..joe little dick
11/10/2004 Litcube (5): The King.
12/6/2007 TheBuyer: this is my favorite short
12/7/2007 Mr. Pony: Hey, yeah.