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“Walking out on another big showdown, Johnny Crisco?” Johnny Disco froze in his tracks. All eyes were on him at the Sunrise Highway Bowling & Dance Emporium. His face registered nothing, but his fingernails dug into the extra-large Orange Julius as he struggled to master his emotions. Lifting his free hand to his ear and feigning a confused expression, he said, “What, mom?” Only then did he turn to face his interlocutor. “Oh, it’s you! Your high-pitched voice made me think it was a woman. Jordaches too tight, Reggie… Trash?” Reggie Flash’s ears turned redder than his ruby medallion. Disco pressed his advantage. “Anyway, Trash, how we gonna compete? Everyone knows I aint tap danced since the oil embargo.” “Yeah, I heard that line before, Crisco—when you chickened out of the Lightning Round last Friday at Corvette’s! Where'd you go, anyway? Home to find out "who killed J.R.?"” "No. Out to the parking lot to "give your sister my herpes."" “YOU TAKE THAT BACK, TURKEY!” Flash exploded, slapping Disco's beverage to the floor. Flash’s boys were too fast. Before Disco could grab his lapels, Fat Danny stepped in front of his leader and presented an impenetrable wall of electric blue satin. "Why don't you tell Wilt Chambermaid here to take a hike, Trash?! Then you and me can go round and round." “Whoa,” Reggie sneered. “Someone dust your coke supply, or did I just rattle the great Johnny Crisco?” Disco regained his composure and straightened his vest. He called out to the DJ. "Mr. Clean—light up the floor!" He let the enormity of the moment sink in before adding, "And spin some KC." Reggie snickered. “You just signed your last dance card, foosball. By the time I get done with you, you’re gonna wish you was an Iran hostage.” [Dance montage.] “You ain’t heard the last of this, Crisco! Word travels fast on the soul circuit! Every boogie baby, rug cutter, and freaky-deaky funk doctor in town’s gonna be grooving for your title!” “Good,” Disco said, pumping his hips, “Because that’s the way, uh-huh uh-huh, I like it!”

Date Written: August 07, 2011
Author: qualcomm
Average Vote: 4.28571

08/8/2011 Jimson S. Sorghum (5): Impenetrable wall of blue satin.
08/8/2011 Jimson S. Sorghum: And that last line, acourse.
08/8/2011 Dylan Danko: This better not star John Heder and Will Ferrell.
08/8/2011 Dylan Danko (4):
08/9/2011 Will Disney (4):
08/10/2011 Jon Matza (4.5): Yuh.
08/12/2011 TheBuyer (4): save acme much?
08/12/2011 Dylan Danko: Extra half star for Corvette's
08/13/2011 Ewan Snow (4): This is a quality short.
11/27/2011 Litcube (4.5):
03/30/2012 anonymous: Eliza: are you friends with Siri?
03/30/2012 Eliza (): Do you have many friends?
03/30/2012 anonymous: Eliza: Yeah, tons. But I was asking if you knew Siri. Is she nice?
03/30/2012 Eliza (): Would you like to expand on that idea?
11/15/2012 qualcomm: Eliza:
11/15/2012 Eliza (): What do you think was the author's intention?
11/17/2012 Marvin_Bernstein: too many commas