home authors guest shorts graphical shorts


“Could I please have a boat, Santa?” The tiny lad cast his eyes down bashfully.

Claus' pulse raced. He wasn't sure whether he loathed the boy’s transparent avarice or his own susceptibility to it more. Clearly the youngster was was seeking to parlay his shy passivity and fair complexion (or rather the electrifying aphrodisiac effects they produced) into extra toys he didn't deserve. Claus knew he’d have to play along. Keep it jolly, he reminded himself severely.

“That depends, Jeremy...have you been a good boy this year?” Claus struggled to keep the husky tremor out of his voice as he dandled the stripling on his knee.

“Yes, Santa.”

I'll bet you have, you dirty little whore. Claus felt his cock grow three sizes. I'll give you a christmas present all right, sonny boy, one you'll never forget: ANAL.

That Christmas morning not one but TWO beautiful new boats sat waiting for Jeremy under the tree.

Date Written: August 24, 2003
Author: Jon Matza
Average Vote: 4.75

08/26/2003 Ewan Snow (4): This is a pretty good one. Good thing ANAL was in all CAPS, by the way. I might not have understood otherwise...
08/27/2003 Phony Millions (4): Yes and nice use of 'dandle'; Feldspar has been known to use that word as well
09/5/2003 Jimson S. Sorghum (5): Referring to the jolly old elf by his surname is a really nice touch, as is "Keep it jolly."
03/24/2004 qualcomm (5): yes, much better than disney's.
03/24/2004 scoop: Yeah, ok, you get not four but FIVE stars under your tree.
03/24/2004 scoop (5): here they is!
06/21/2004 Mr. Pony (5): How do you size a cock?
05/26/2005 The Rid (5): Don't know how I came across this short. Glad I did, though.
05/26/2005 John Slocum (5): My cock grew 3 sizes reading this.
01/15/2009 Dylan Danko: I don't get it.