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The Jewess lowered herself onto the Jew's bolt-upright cock with the avidity of a Jew beholding his stash of ill-gotten lucre. She leaned back, and began a series of lurching upward hip thrusts, fairly crushing her lover's Jew-member in the pincer-grip of her Christ-denying labia minora. Some 26 years earlier, the very Jew-shaft that was currently buried to the hilt in Hebrew gash -- the same eugenically grotesque Israelite cock that would presently unleash a torrent of scheming, usurious Yid-ejaculate into the demon depths of kike cunt -- had been husked of its foreskin by a grasping, hook-nosed Jew, who performed the savage Jew-rite with the brisk efficiency of a Jew desecrating the host, or plotting mass-media dominance.

Spangles of late afternoon sunlight played on the Jew-duvet. The hymie tugged at his filthy beard and sidelocks, sighed, straggled to his feet, and padded Jewishly to the water closet, where he urinated in a manner typical of members of his accursed race. The She-sheeny was splayed across the bed, in a hideous posture of Hebraic post-coital repose.

Date Written: February 07, 2004
Author: Craig Lewis
Average Vote: 3.8333

02/16/2004 anonymous: Certainly this short would have been more acceptable if the author himself had been jewish!
02/16/2004 senator (4): Ha! Lewis' best short yet, in my opinion.
02/16/2004 Craig Lewis: The author is Jewish, you pig-Nazi anti-Semite! Do the goyim write such prose?
02/16/2004 senator: Racists! You're all a bunch of racists!
02/16/2004 Benny Maniacs (3): Well written but ultimately a one note (Jew) samba.
02/16/2004 qualcomm (3): jeez, you all know how i hate to cry ripoff, but hasn't this ground already been adequately covered by.... me? and here too.
02/16/2004 Mr. Pony: There's no denying that the joke is similar in all three shorts. Identical in the case of this short and your first link. Eerie. So what were you thinking when you ripped yourself off?
02/16/2004 qualcomm: the second one is a sequel to the first.
02/16/2004 Mr. Pony: Yes. That's not a rip-off, right? Like Aliens wasn't a rip-off of Alien. But then, Terminator 3 WAS a rip-off of Terminator 2. So you must understand my confusion. I don't mean to pick at this one; I'm sorry. This is the first time your complaints of plagiarism don't sound like the ravings of a lunatic. The joke's identical, and the short is actually funny (for the same reasons that your short was, which I'm sure is pissing you off all the more). Anyway. Is it still a rip-off if Craig never read the first one? Which I'm sure he didn't?
02/16/2004 anonymous (4): Similar in idea to Feldspar's first, yes. But funnier.
02/16/2004 qualcomm: no, i was using the term 'ripoff' liberally to inflame. but i misspoke when i said sequel. my second spud rogen short is actually serial. the story continues from one to the other. questions are answered.
02/16/2004 Craig Lewis: Here we go again. No, I didn't see Feldspar's short(s) before I wrote this one. Yes, they are very similar.
02/16/2004 senator: If it makes you feel any better. Your short was funnier.
02/16/2004 Will Disney: No, no, Feldspar owns anti-semitism. Sorry, Lewis!
02/16/2004 scoop: Say what you will about the tenets of anti-semitism, Will, but at least its an ethos.
02/16/2004 qualcomm: yeah listen to disney, the only person in the world who enjoys the shorts of frankenstone.
02/16/2004 Mr. Pony: Say, where IS Frankenstone?
02/16/2004 Mr. Pony: I guess if we're comparing the two shorts, I gotta say Feldstorm's first is the winner. I feel like I've heard most of the jokes in "The Jewess lowered..." before, but the thing about the safe combination in "Spud Rogen picked..." caused me to create a shit so beautiful that I had to show it to all my neighbors. Also, Craig seems to have stepped right over that "Labia Menorah" joke. Not sure what to make of that.
02/16/2004 Craig Lewis: Labia Menorah: too Catskills.
02/17/2004 Dylan Danko (4): I have to give this 4 stars simply for the line, "Spangles of late afternoon sunlight played on the Jew-duvet."
03/25/2004 scoop (5): Not as good as Snow, but brillaint!