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Sunlight hit Jon "Feldy" Feldspar's face sharply. He opened his eyes and before he had time to finish his stretch two monstrous looking characters, having escaped from the film Dark Crystal, sidled up to his face. Far from recoiling, he took their approach in stride. "Ah, Bozzy and Fold, my babies", he murmured. "You were both in my dreamy dreams all nighty night long." As he cooed, he stroked their scruffs and took notice of the stirring in his loins. He finished his stretch, pulled away the duvet covers and climbed out of bed. "Now, I wonder, what will the day bring me?" he thought aloud. Outside, it was indeed a pleasant day but Feldy would not indulge himself in it. A day of downloading Bangbus videos from his living room computer awaited him, while his girlfriend worked studiously on her laptop in their bedroom . After a cup of coffee and an extended stint in front of the mirror in his girlfriend’s panties, he sat down at his computer and let out a satisfied sigh. As he read the Drudge Report on line he ran his hands over his biceps, something he enjoyed doing almost as much as talking about them. "Golly honey," he yelled to his girlfriend in the other room, "I can't wait for the mail carrier to arrive. Today they'll surely deliver my letter from MTV with a contract to sign and a bonus check worth thousands of dollars!" As he finished the sentence he heard a loud thud in the bedroom. He leapt from his seat and ran to the bedroom door clutching his pajamas. His girlfriend was on the floor in what seemed like a fit of epilepsy but was, upon further examination, one of hysterical laughter. "Oh, honey," he said, in contraposto, "are you laughing at me again?" She shook her head vigorously but couldn't stop pointing at him, which brought on more laughter. "Well, I'm glad I amuse you." Her head began to nod vigorously now but she was still unable to speak.

Date Written: February 04, 2003
Author: Dylan Danko
Average Vote: 3

02/4/2003 anonymous (1):
02/4/2003 anonymous (1):
02/4/2003 anonymous (5):
01/29/2004 Will Disney: ha! 1!
03/1/2004 Mr. Pony (5): As of 12:30PM March first, two thousand four, this was the lowest rated short on the entire site. I'm guessing that this is the sort of short that inspired the "Inside Short" mark. It's pretty inside, but it does have that mark on it. Made me laugh anyway. I can picture Feldspar musing out loud "Now, I wonder, what will the day bring me?" I can also picture Danko typing this at his desk, barely able to contain himself. That, too, is funny. So I give it many stars. I laugh: ha HA!
03/1/2004 Dylan Danko: Thank you Pony. This short wasn't very good but it didn't deserve it's cumulative one star rating. Some people are without morals.