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Date Written: May 09, 2004
Author: Mr. Pony
Average Vote: 4.69231

05/13/2004 Ferucio P. Chhretan (5): I hate you, Pony.
05/13/2004 John Slocum (5): What a nice, humble robot.
05/13/2004 Will Disney (5): greatest short ever
05/13/2004 Will Disney: i wish i could give this one 20 stars!
05/13/2004 Benny Maniacs: I am crying for Ariel.
05/13/2004 Benny Maniacs (5): Crying.
05/13/2004 anonymous: That's airea.
05/13/2004 Not Lisa (5): I LOVE THIS ONE. You have BRILLIANTLY taken what could be the worst twenty-something, starbucks-slurping, Parliment-chain smoking, pile of shit journal-therapy and turned it into a glorious present of perfect sarcasm. AWESOME!!!!
05/13/2004 Will Disney: Now, here's the question: should I email Airea about this?
05/13/2004 Will Disney: Where's Annebot?
05/13/2004 Jon Matza (5): 1. While I'm wary of some of Pony's more conceptual pieces this one's first rate. Esp liked applause at end and the 'pan over the audience' shot. 2. Robot's voice sounds like Marge's sisters on the Simpsons. 3. Re 'perfect sarcasm': 1/2 agree, but isn't this also something of an affectionate tribute, Author? 4. Disney: Who do you think you are, creator of the site? Resist your urge to play God. Let nature run its course.
05/13/2004 anonymous: Yeah, sarcasm? I don't know about that. Airea's a good kid.
05/13/2004 Not Lisa: Ohhh, read the poem after voting. Someone actually submitted that to this literary circle jerk?
05/13/2004 Will Disney: isn't it more of a literary daisy chain?
05/13/2004 Jimson S. Sorghum: I can't help but think that airea is no longer with us. Don't bother emailing, Disney.
05/13/2004 anonymous: My goodness! What a thing to say!
05/13/2004 scoop: Screw you, author, you "Oh-I'm-such-a-man-of-the-people- anti-elitist-talented-ironic-artistically gifted-art school grad-Dada-influneced-post-modern-modern-surrealist" uber-elitist ass hole. Making fun of broads, is, like all one star and everything. But making fun of a suicide victim is, like, totally fine. And don't give me that "Who-made-fun?-it's-just-a-tribute, I'm-just-a-harmless-Pony-who-wants-to-romp-and-play-and-take-you-on-rides-through-the-enchanted-forest" crap. Your a monster, and its your emotions that make you one. Your stinking, curdled emotions, rotting like discared vegtables in the indifferent sun. Ass. Jerk.
05/13/2004 anonymous: Um. My goodness! What a thing to say!
05/13/2004 TheBuyer (5): King High Shit Of Short Mountain. I have a crush...
five for scoop for the last comment as well. bank em, i'll owe you.
05/13/2004 qualcomm (5):
05/13/2004 John Slocum: So many fantastic touches!
05/14/2004 TheBuyer: such a pretty poem.
05/17/2004 John Slocum: This gets better and better. I love the inflections. There's an innocence here.
05/17/2004 catfish (5): pony's my hero. genius.
05/17/2004 TheBuyer: I keep giong back to this, fucking brilliant read. I'm a professional talker, this is a professional comment. Very professional. I have on black socks and everything.
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: scoop: Why is it that when anyone brings up that old argument, they totally mischaracterize my position; suggesting that I was somehow defending women's basketball's right to exist with dignity instead of reacting to a rehash of an old and tired joke receiving ridiculously high marks?
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: Everybody else: Thanks.
05/17/2004 scoop: There are plenty of old jokes on this site that are rehashed that get rave reviews, like ripping off someone elses short and having a robot read it. Man that gets all fives! But more importantly, in terms of this discussion, you did that thing which, I find cute because you think its a secret, where you change the nature of an argument, divert attention to somehting else you think a stupid monkey like myslef will get heated about in the hopes that I forget the original point. And to boot, you humble yourself before the audeince that is wathcing the debate in an attempt to garner their future support. I would like to ask Pony, are you making fun of airea or not with this short? Or do you still insist its a tribute?
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: I don't think I was trying to divert the argument. All I was saying is that your argument that I'm some sort of hyphenated-hypocrite is flawed because one of your basic assumptions is flawed. That "making fun of broads" comment was referring to the Women's Basketball Affair, wasn't it? I'm hardly being secretive, just addressing one of your points. As for this short, while I'm not sure it deserves all fives (and you're more than welcome to one-star it, scoop, if you feel the need to), I'm also not sure that it is just a simple repeating of a joke, as you seem to suggest. I like to think I added at least a little bit of commentary. Was I making fun of Airea's poem? Of course I was. Was this a tribute? I fear the answer to this may be less obvious, but yes, this short was very much an affectionate tribute, as Matza suggested. If you like, I can explain this.
05/17/2004 scoop: Please do.
05/17/2004 scoop: ...because it being a subtle point and all, I need it explained, blah, blah, blah....
05/17/2004 qualcomm: god, i can't wait to hear this... i may want to deduct a star if i believe your forthcoming argument, pony, but i get the feeling i won't.
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: When I first had the idea to do this short, I knew it was, at the very least, a mean thing to do. I also realized that it had the potential to be pretty funny. Having no desire to directly attack Airea, and simultaneously understanding that doing this in a purely mean-spirited way would kill all the humor, I decided to take a different approach. In reading the poem, I tried to do it as much justice as I could. Behind the writing issues and hyper-dramatic tone and overly typical angst, there's real human thought and emotion behind the words, and I did my best to see that and interpret it for what it was. I wanted to bring out the best in what was there. I think this actually makes the joke funnier, for some reason. Also, I feel like I got to know Airea a little, at least as far as one person can get to know another through a single piece of writing!
05/17/2004 Jon Matza: Scoop & Lerpa=old man seeking to put a limit on Pony's forever?
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: P.S. This poem is absolutely not a suicide note. It's an affirmation of the control the author has over her own life and destiny!
05/17/2004 scoop: Are you so uncomfortable with your dark side that you need to stoop to such verbal withcery to avoid having to admit you riduculed someone demonstrably lesser than you? "Real human thought and emotion." Come on. Everything all humans do contains thought and emotion. Every short on here is the product of thought and emotion practiced by humans -- Matza, Snow, Disney, me -- all humans. And yet it was airea's poem that you had the robot read. Don't get me wrong Pony I find this hilarious. I think its one of the funniest things you've done. But come on! Your Skywalker like reluctance to admit to your dark side is unbecoming.
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: This short's very existence is ample evidence of my willingness to acknowledge my "dark side".
05/17/2004 scoop (5): Even though I'm right I give you five stars because I don't think you can help being the way you are. And that's ok. I accept you and your fascinating menagerie of complicated feelings and brooding inner life for who your are. I know it must be difficult carrying this burden of superiority -- intelligence, wit and creativity -- and still deeling with the teeming mass of trogs on a daily basis. I know that you deal with it the way a prsioner does by making a game out of his sentence to while away the time. I apologize for trying to pull away your curtain. Your entitled to your privacy, the same you are entitled to make us laugh at teh expense of sacchrine writer liek airea. If there's anyhting I can do, please, let me know.
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: Gosh! Where is all this coming from? Seriously, I don't get it. Exactly what are you right about again?
05/17/2004 Jon Matza: While I suspect Scoop's argument is 75% motivated by the urge to give Pony a hard time, and I support this--I nonetheless have more to add here. "Tribute" may have been the wrong word, but I'm convinced the goodwill behind this short is equal to or greater than malicious intent. The robot's sincere reading tone and the care lavished on the "shots" -- angles, lighting, etc --suggest to me that Pony's intent was not to ridicule the poem but to transform/reinterpret it by placing it in a different context & medium. I think he succeeds! The obvious comparison is to a cover song that surpasses the original, or a hack novel turned into a great movie, e.g. the Godfather. Also, I imagine the impetus behind the short was partly experimental--i.e., "I'll try this and see if it has an interesting effect."
05/17/2004 qualcomm: perhaps that was the pony's intent, but it sure doesn't come off as anything but ridicule.
05/17/2004 Ferucio P. Chhretan: What if the reader had never read the airea short? I s it still ridicule if the source is unknown? I guess it becomes ridicule of something else altogether.
05/17/2004 Will Disney: i disagree with you, the lerpa. airea's poem had become a sort of recurring joke topic or 'meme' within the acme community. pony's short draws upon and expands that. there's not much really in the short that is directly attacking airea's short. it's context makes it funny both because of the crappiness of the original poem but also becuase of how the poem has continued to resurface on acme on a regular basis. in summary, f u.
05/17/2004 scoop: Um, Will the reason the poes is a "meme" is because it represents something that we all revile. while we all may disagree on many things here we have more or less agreed that airea's short sucked, that it is funny for the wrong reason, that it appeals to the worse kind of low-brow artsy sensibility, etc. Pony is drawing on airea's work because the short itself has become shorthand for a seriousness that is antithetical to what is done here. to say he draws on it neutrally is insane. furthermore F U.
05/17/2004 qualcomm: pony, regarding your explanation for the intent behind this short: you say that you tried to do the poem some actual justice because to do it in a purely mean-spirited way would kill all the humor. i agree. but the fact remains that your intent was humor, and the humor is "look at this crappy, pretentious poem (read by a robot)." so your 'serious' treatment of the text was a stylistic choice, intended to 1) make airea look even more ridiculous than her poem already did; and 2) precipitate her suicide.
you are the bögeyman.
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: The robot, as you know, has appeared before, and his participation in this short seemed entirely appropriate, given the subject matter. Also, is it your assertion that it is impossible for me to mock this poem while simultaneously trying to understand, redeem, and yes, love its author? We've tangled over this before, Lerpa. Must it always be one or the other? Could it be that your black and charred little heart allows you to see see only darkness?
05/17/2004 qualcomm: no, in fact, pony, i have myself made similar arguments on behalf of my own shorts. i can't remember which right now, but i have. what i am saying is that what you describe as an attempt to treat the poem with some respect feels to me more like a stylistic device to heighten the ridicule. As you know, Case-by-Case Feldspar is my nickname.
05/17/2004 Jon Matza: Anyone else...? Was your initial reaction to this short closer to Lerpspar's superficial reading (this short conveys pure ridicule) or my much more penetrating, accurate one (this short conveys a combination of ridicule & affection)?
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: Can we start calling you Feldspar again, then?
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: And I'm glad we understand each other on the multiple intent thing. It was a stylistic device. But it wasn't just a stylistic device. Which of us can say they never had an afternoon like this? Take my hand/Come back to the land/Where everything’s ours/For a few hours...
05/17/2004 qualcomm: stonehenge?
05/17/2004 Ewan Snow: I think The Lerpa's wrong and Pony's telling the more-or-less-truth. I actually got the sense while listening to it that the poem came off better than it does in text form, that Pony searched for a way to read it that made it a little better. It came off as more of a mediocre beat poem than a disastrous teen-angst poem, though, admittedly, there is not much difference between the two. Still, it seems weird that everyone gave this five. I mean it's good, but, like, who cares?
05/17/2004 qualcomm: what are you saying snow? that there's nothing at stake?
05/17/2004 qualcomm: incidentally, (no offense to pony) i thought the reading of the poem was terrible. i'm not sure how you could read this shitter, but this reading: bad.
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: We should have a contest!
05/17/2004 Ewan Snow (4): No, I meant "who cares?" in the metaphysical sense, not just about this short, but in general. And as for the reading, it had the usual failings of a poetry reading, but was still better that the poem on the page.
05/17/2004 qualcomm: you mean, a contest to read the poem? will you put our recordings thru the robotizing filter and post it here, pony?
05/17/2004 Mr. Pony: Or I could make separate files and everyone could post their own...!
05/17/2004 qualcomm: who cares, snow? who cares?! [censored]'s godfather, that's who.
05/17/2004 qualcomm: [censored]sevich
05/18/2004 mr.coffee (2): sorry Mr.Pony, probably due to my short attention span, I got sort of bored half-way through this....Yes you are a talented individual, your art is beautiful, your intelect vast, and your emotional sensitivity stirring, but in this case I have to withold my stars 'cause of one thing.....and one thing only....I FUCKING HATE POETRY.
05/18/2004 scoop: "Mr. Coffee Make holes in teeth! (grunt, grunt)"
05/18/2004 mr.coffee: don't really get that, unless you're calling me a monkey..sandy
05/20/2004 Will Disney: greatest ever
12/29/2004 The Rid (5): This may be my favorite short. Huzzah!
12/29/2004 Litcube: Listen to the accent on "rubber ball". Like Larry Laffer.
03/27/2005 Litcube: Like a rubber baahl.
04/15/2010 Jon Matza: 1. Upon review, one notices the robut's cadence/inflection is a little bit Shatner-like, neh?

2. Awethor's contest idea whereby dif't individuals record their readings and post the results was 24K gold plated and should be enacted promptly. New contest disney??? We could have it on Wednesday April 21st, Administrative Professional's Day. Aughthors record and post their .mp3 files beforehand, then at the specified time we all listen to the results en masse and comment/vote in a sort of live national broadcast situation-program (international actually if you include the Canadians). The First Annual Airea Symposium if you will. (though I'd be flexible about calling it a webinar if others prefer). It'd be an historical event, like 9/11, only less window jumping. Note: I'm not joking about this premise, I would totally participate. Imagine TREE reading this thing. Frankenstone. Dick Vomit. Benny Maniacs. &tc!!!
04/15/2010 Mr. Pony: I second this great idea!