AcmeShorts

I peeled off my sock and examined the large open sore on my instep. The area all around it was red and puffy. The sore itself had been draining well, so I was kind of proud of it in a sense, but I was still a little concerned. I grabbed a paperclip from the table and unbent it. But the most gentle, tenuous probing of my wound was excruciating, so I decided to jab it hard in the hopes of killing whatever was living in there with one quick thrust. I remembered something about the walls, or was it the drapes? Or the ceiling. I was distracted with these thoughts as I jabbed the paperclip in the wound with all my strength. A blast of cosmic pain ripped through my body and threw me on the floor. I don’t remember what happened next but I noticed that the walls were closing in a bit and there was a dark glow coming from over by the drapes. I crawled toward it and propped myself up against the wall. The wall was pressing against my back harder than I expected and I kept glancing back over my shoulder to make sure I was keeping it in place. When I collected myself enough to remember my wound I noticed that my foot was covered in blood. I tugged at the paperclip, but it was still extremely painful and seemed to be resisting my efforts. I screwed up my courage, and, making sure to keep the wall in place, yanked it out. Again, an excruciating flash of pain and a solid push against my back by the wall that doubled me over onto the floor. My eyes were bleary with tears so I couldn’t quite see, but there was something wiggling on the carpet before me. I wiped my eyes and then wiped them again, unable to believe what I saw. There was small creature impaled on the paperclip. He seemed to be a likeable enough fellow, naked as can be and all of two inches tall, covered in green slime and blood. But as I learned, strangely enough, he was far from likeable. In fact he was rather rude.

“You shouldn’t have done that!” he slurred, pulling the paperclip clear out of his gut. He scampered across the carpet toward my foot. I tried to pull it away, but he was too fast. He started clawing at my wound and crawled back in. I was blinded by the pain. “What do you want?” I screamed.

“I’m going back in to die,” he said as he wriggled head first into my open wound. “First I’ll feast on the bones in your feet and lay my eggs.” It was as if he were bragging. I couldn’t blame him, considering I’d mortally wounded him.

The dark glow from the drapes grew stronger and the wall puffed out, slowly pushing me into the center of the room.

“What is going on with the walls?” I screamed. “What is that dark glow from the drapes?”

The little creature popped out of my wound just long enough to answer. “That’s something totally unrelated,” he said. “I don’t know anything about the walls or the drapes. I just live in feet.” A sad smirk spread over his face and I got the idea that he was laying his eggs. He settled back into my foot and disappeared from view. For another minute I could feel him moving in there, but then it stopped.