AcmeShorts

12/29/2004 The Rid: I'm not sure I get it.

12/29/2004 qualcomm: the political message really sticks in my craw

12/29/2004 scoop: I'm not really sure I understand what the political message is.

12/29/2004 TheBuyer: so that's what a dick-vomit would look like.

12/29/2004 qualcomm: you know, it's like, "red state americans who want to bomb iraq are dumb and stuff"

12/29/2004 Litcube: How do you know he's referring to Americans?

12/29/2004 qualcomm: possibly he's referring to others in the coalition of the willing, but come on, to assume anything else is just playing dumb

12/29/2004 TheBuyer: what's Birdneck? Author, where are you going with this, is this a real thing someone said who looks like this guy? I thought the coughing up a cock thing was pretty cool, but I've never heard 'expelling penis' used to describe someone who isn't making sense.

12/29/2004 qualcomm: dude, come on, he didn't base this on anybody. what the hell's wrong with you? fucking those kittens is making you stupid, and it's illegal anyway.

12/29/2004 scoop (1): I wonder if the author of this thing would find it funny if the character said somehting equally canned form the opposite political point of view. Or would he think its as thoughtless and unfunny as it is now.

12/29/2004 scoop: "from"

12/29/2004 The Rid: Well, I was gonna 1-star this thing, but scoop beat me to it. Should I do it anyway?

12/29/2004 qualcomm (3): i'll give it a three for the pleasure i get from clicking the next button real fast

12/29/2004 TheBuyer (3): they want it.

12/29/2004 The Rid (2): Though I agree that it looks interesting when one clicks the next button really fast, this thing didn't make me laugh. I give TheBuyer's "Dick Vomit" comment five stars, though.

12/29/2004 Streifenbeuteldachs (3): One wonders how the penis and testes got in there in the first place.

12/29/2004 TheBuyer: he didn't chew them, that's for sure.

12/29/2004 anonymous: Aww, hey dudes. Without reading all the comments, I just gots to say: I really, really wanted to strip out the comment and replace it with a TREE-ism from the message boards maybe (or nothing at all), but I don't the Flash so good! At first, there was no statement at all, just oral cock birthing, but I thought that was insufficient. I knew a political quote would be terrible but I was powerless to remove it. DAMN

12/29/2004 anonymous: **Don't KNOW the Flash so good. Yeah...

12/29/2004 anonymous: And last....I was looking for an annoying placeholder type of quote and got this off the web. It's what's her face...uhhh...Ann Coulter. But I knew a politically charged statement would eat turds on Acme. Dammit.

12/30/2004 TheBuyer: really is a shame, no shit. i played with that cock all day.

12/30/2004 scoop: Oral cock birthing is a whole differnt story. If you get Disney to swap that in, ill give up 5 the stars.

12/30/2004 hagit mizrachy (4): The pave 'em and take the oil mentality coming out of a talking monkey is a match. And you gotta like Dick Vomit Dick Vomitin'.

12/30/2004 Litcube (4): Your cock is well done.

12/30/2004 John Slocum (4): Hey Dick, your cock is well done.

12/30/2004 Dick Vomit: You are kind. What wine would you serve to someone mouthbirthing cock in your restaurant?

12/30/2004 scoop: Wait, so a cock coming out of a mouth is somehow more intelligent then the short on the homepage, Slocum? How is this an example the author not just saying ooooooohhooo, look I can make a cock come out of this dudes mouth?

12/30/2004 Dick Vomit: Well, that is all it is.

12/30/2004 scoop: No its not. Its all like, political and what not, which cheapens it, even though you didn't mean to. I'm fine with the idea of cock yacking in and of itself.

12/30/2004 Dick Vomit: You want to suckle at Coulter's arid wrinkled mess. That it?

12/30/2004 scoop: All I want, Dick Vomit, as I explained in the introduciton to my thesis "The Dangers of Democratic Theory Without Lmits: The Importance of Instituional Thinking" is for people not to dupe themselves in to thinking there are frictionless solutions to the intractable problems of political life. "People have long lists of socail goods, wants and desiresthat are important but incompatible," I write. "Without the luxury of 'angelic' natures," I continue, "they lack the incentive to make the appropriate choices to make all the jigsaw aspirations fit." Furthermore, I write that, "human nature and democracy make for an uncomfortable fit. The bridge linking institutional thinking to limitations is the paradox of self-rule." That, Dick Vomit, is all I want. If that in some way makes me the type of person who wants to "suckle" at a television commentators "mess" than I guess I'm guilty.

12/30/2004 Dick Vomit: Yes/ok.

12/30/2004 scoop: affirm/agree?

12/30/2004 Dick Vomit: affirm/suckle at the rotten folds of Coulter's Mess

12/30/2004 scoop: homosayaffirm/agree?

12/30/2004 Dick Vomit: affirm/agree?

12/30/2004 Dick Vomit: OH, HELL!

01/17/2005 Dick Vomit: this would have not sucked/sucked less if I'd called it Self Portrait. and left out the gay part about the gayness