AcmeShorts

On the Eve of Colostomy


We’ve made it through the polyps

And crohn’s disease, it’s true

We've perfumed the air with pumpkin

And dollops of chickeny poo.



Say goodbye to the little brown eye

Farewell, farewell, farewell

Say goodbye to the little brown eye

In bunghole heaven you’ll dwell


You brought me myriad pleasures

A place to store the spunk

A hole for that salami

The maple sapling trunk


But I’ll say goodbye to the little brown eye

Because that’s what I must do

Say goodbye to the little brown eye

Adieu, adieu, a doo


A wheel is only as good as

The space within its hub,

I’ll be lost with out you, oh holiest of holes,

That is: Hey, I’ll miss you, bub.


And we’ll say goodbye to the little brown eye

With the loudest voice we know

Say goodbye to the little brown eye

I’ll miss you when I go!